The Mana Pools Twelve Step Program Continued: The Aftermath

 

Step One: You are done with your memorable Mana Pools trip.  As soon as you get home, that is.  You forge a river to escape the pending rainstorm that will trap you in the worst national parks lodge you’ve ever seen.  Well, since Gonarezhou.

 

Step Two: Drive five and a half hours home, arriving after dark with a child who has come down with a bad cold on the car ride home. (This "cold" will last a week and involve three doctor's visits, three medicines, feared malaria, and four days of 103 degree temperatures.)

Step Three: Leave all luggage by the door.  Feed everyone before heading for a bath and bed.  Notice a number of bites on your child’s head as you wash him.  Ponder why your husband does not want to bathe until morning.

Step Four: Awaken to a child covered in bites.  Find some on your ankles and hands.  Realize in the daylight that you are missing part of one of your wheels.

Step Five: Get a phone call from the Mullens; Luke is worse and going to the doctor.  By the way, do you have bites? 

Step Six: Start the arduous process of unpacking and laundry.  After doing two loads, get a phone call from Julie: BEDBUGS.  The dr has taken one look at Luke and diagnosed us all with bedbugs.  The good news? They are not the death sentence they are in the US.  African bedbugs do not transfer as easily.  Most likely they have stayed at Mana Pools, that place you are now cursing.  Still, plant a seed of paranoia in your mind. Then start the laundry over, washing and drying everything in the highest heat possible.

Step Seven: Realize that your lovely husband who slept unbathed in your bed may have just infected your mattress and, oh, entire household.

Step Eight: Strip the bed. Isolate it. Do laundry like you have never done before.

Step Nine:  Watch as your bodies slowly develop more and more bites, covering you with an itchy pale rash.  Gorgeous.

Step Ten: Take your car to the mechanic for the crazy sound. Whew. Sigh of relief.  Only $35 dollars for an engine cleaning. Nothing is wrong with the car.  Oh, except for that piece of the wheel you must now buy. And oh, except for the bedbugs that may infect it. Park the car in the sun and try to cook it.  Pull the car seat apart into pieces and wash. Repeat.

Step Eleven: Sleep in the guest bedroom. Repeat for two weeks.

Step Twelve: Wait 14 days to see if your bedbug infestation is gone, or if you have now infected everything in your home. Oh, the things we did for a little place called Mana Pools.

Many thanks to Dan and Ryan Mullen for some of the great pics!!