Step Two: Drive five and a half hours home, arriving after dark with a child who has come down with a bad cold on the car ride home. (This "cold" will last a week and involve three doctor's visits, three medicines, feared malaria, and four days of 103 degree temperatures.)
Step Three: Leave all luggage by the door. Feed everyone before heading for a bath and bed. Notice a number of bites on your child’s head as you wash him. Ponder why your husband does not want to bathe until morning.
Step Three: Leave all luggage by the door. Feed everyone before heading for a bath and bed. Notice a number of bites on your child’s head as you wash him. Ponder why your husband does not want to bathe until morning.
Step Four: Awaken to a child covered in bites. Find some on your ankles and hands. Realize in the daylight that you are missing
part of one of your wheels.
Step Five: Get a phone call from the Mullens; Luke is worse
and going to the doctor. By the way, do
you have bites?
Step Six: Start the arduous process of unpacking and laundry. After doing two loads, get a phone call from
Julie: BEDBUGS. The dr has taken one
look at Luke and diagnosed us all with bedbugs.
The good news? They are not the death sentence they are in the US. African bedbugs do not transfer as easily. Most likely they have stayed at Mana Pools,
that place you are now cursing. Still,
plant a seed of paranoia in your mind. Then start the laundry over, washing and
drying everything in the highest heat possible.
Step Seven: Realize that your lovely husband who slept
unbathed in your bed may have just infected your mattress and, oh, entire
household.
Step Eight: Strip the bed. Isolate it. Do laundry like you have never done before.
Step Nine: Watch as your bodies slowly develop more and more bites, covering you with an itchy pale rash. Gorgeous.
Step Ten: Take your car to the mechanic for the crazy sound.
Whew. Sigh of relief. Only $35 dollars
for an engine cleaning. Nothing is wrong with the car. Oh, except for that piece of the wheel you
must now buy. And oh, except for the bedbugs that may infect it. Park the car
in the sun and try to cook it. Pull the
car seat apart into pieces and wash. Repeat.
Step Eleven: Sleep in the guest bedroom. Repeat for two
weeks.