Friday, August 9, 2013

You Know You've Lived In Our Africa...

When we lived in New York City, tourists were identifiable by a number of never-failing qualities.  They wore tennis shoes, jeans, and baggy coats.  They walked slower than everyone else and clogged the sidewalk four across.  And they were always looking up to gawk at buildings.  Here the tourists are the people who stop to look at monkeys.



We are officially not tourists any more. Now that we've been here a year, here are some ways you know you've lived in our Africa for a year...

-When you don't look twice at large spiders, geckos, or skinks on your walls.

-When "now now" "just now" "izzit" "wazzit" and "doezzit" and "eesh" become part of your vocabulary.

-When you've dewormed your child... more than once.

-When you eat avocados more for breakfast than at any other meal.

-When traffic stops no longer bother you, even if they include an AK-47 wielding soldier.

-When you carry an untouchable $20 in the glove box for bribes at said traffic stops.

-When it is not sacrilege to dump the leftover guacamole in the trash.

-When you have bought a license to own a television and a separate one to own a car radio.

-When you know what words like chongololo, tsessebe, arvie, pram, braii, and avo mean.

-When you know that words like "geyser" and "robot" don't really mean "geyser" or "robot".

-When you can calmly step out of the way of a hippo or elephant who has decided to graze during your riverside braii.

-When you know five ways to eat sadza/mealiepap.

-When you no longer cringe when somebody jams a screwdriver or pair of scissors into an outlet in order to plug something in.